Q: What is this? Where am I?
A: This is a website with information about comedian Jared Logan.
Q: Who are you? Why are you doing this to me?
A: I am your friend, comedian Jared Logan. I want to entertain you.
Q: Let me go! You can't hold me here against my will!
A: I'm afraid we have to keep you here for observation. You should be released after several weeks.
Q: My friends will find me! They'll rescue me!
A: Your friends are already dead. My associate Dr. Finger has seen to that. Please just relax and stare into the blinking light.
Q: If Jared Logan had a million dollars, what would he do with it?
A: Now you're cooperating! If Jared had a million dollars he would build a mansion underground inside a network of caves.
Q: Can you describe Jared Logan's comedy act?
A: Jared Logan's comedy act is visceral and shocking. It is like a punch in the mouth that makes you realize you don't love your wife. To see a sample, click on Media.
Q: Can you tell me the amazing story of Jared Logan's origins? What is his inspiring story?
A: Click on Bio to learn the soul-encouraging story of Jared Logan's rise to obscurity, tentatively titled "My Brave Battle."
Q: How can I harness Jared Logan's comedic ability for my own foul purposes?
A: To hire Jared Logan contact Silvio Lund at WME here. For college bookings contact Bass Schuler here or call 773-481-2600.
Q: Does Jared Logan have a blog that I can subscribe to and read every day?
A: Jared realizes that you yearn for instructions on how to live, so, much like Oprah, he provides said instructions on his blog, located under Blog.
Q: What is Jared Logan's favorite animal?
A: The kangaroo. Second place runner up: turtles.
Q: Who can judge me?
A: Only God can judge you, but the rest of us will try if you go around asking weird questions like that one.
Q: Who drew these cartoons? They're delightful!
A: Jared Logan drew these cartoons, NATCH!
Q: Who made this website?